SEARS Relationship Theory
What Makes Relationships Work - SEARS Relationship Theory
The SEARS Relationship Theory, developed by Loretta and Steve Worley, is a structured approach to improving relationships. This theory is based on the belief that relationships are learned behaviors, and with proper guidance and practice, couples can improve their relationship dynamics.
SEARS emphasizes personal accountability and growth in relationships, teaching couples to recognize and adjust their behaviors to create healthier, more fulfilling partnerships.
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The SEARS Relationship Theory for healthy relationships breaks down five essential components of most good relationships. SEARS stands for Self-Awareness, Education, Application, Repeatability, and Sustainability. Descriptions for each of these are below.
Self-Awareness - Before addressing any problem, you must first believe there is a problem. If a person has an alcohol use disorder, they usually will not address their drinking until they think they have a problem. Gamblers do not seek to modify their behavior unless they believe a problem exists. The beginning of all change starts with the idea that something needs to be changed. Change only happens if the person becomes aware and believes there is a need for change. Self-awareness is the first step in a better relationship.
Education - Knowing that a problem exists is only helpful if you can learn what the problem means and the methods to mitigate it. Knowing that a door is locked doesn't help you find out what is on the other side. Having a key to the door does. Education unlocks the door that self-awareness brings to your attention. It allows the person to understand the problem and find solutions for it. Education eliminates trial and error and saves valuable time.
Application - Knowing and understanding a problem is not enough; you must practice what you have learned. Even if you become aware of a problem and understand the situation, nothing is gained unless you do something. Application is practicing what you have learned and moving it from theories to reality.
Repeatability - Consistency is a critical factor that determines success in any field. Being able to do what you know to do repeatability means that you have developed a habit of executing your skills or knowledge reliably.
Sustainability - This ensures that you continue doing what you learned. It's easy to change in the short term; it's harder to change permanently. Reliable accountability helps you achieve this. It involves holding yourself personally accountable for applying what you have learned. It also consists of being held responsible by a third person or a higher power.
All relationships require more than one person. The focus of SEARS is for each person to change individually, creating an environment for a healthy relationship. The focus is on evaluating yourself and not your partner. When both do this, a healthy relationship results.
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